An Awkward Moment

Ok, so those of you who have had babies know what this is....the best breast pump ever. And I bought one after I had Andrew, intending to go back to work. However, I changed my mind (another story). It turned out to be a great investment since Andrew was allergic to every formula you can buy at the store. Think projectile vomiting here.

I only used the pump with Ashley when she was in the NICU, and was grateful for it since I knew from having Andrew what using the hospital pumps are like. If you don't know, imagine nursing a calf, or other large barnyard animal. Painful.

Now I have infinite compassion for new moms who are struggling with nursing. Been there, done that. And I also have infinite compassion for new moms with babies in the NICU. Been there and also done that. So when I found out, quite by accident, that the daughter of someone in our ward (the Hills) had her baby at 32 weeks, I happily volunteered my pump.

Now I learned about the birth quite by accident, Cindy was at my house as we were teaching 6 Activity Day Girls to bake bread (also, another story). We were talking about what would happen with her daughter after we heard that the baby had been born at almost 4 lbs (what a blessing). I mentioned that I would be happy to lend her daughter my breast pump (it rocks) and I have done so before (glad to see it being used). She said she would let me know.

Well, this morning I got a phone call from the Hills saying that they were driving over to Utah and would indeed take me up on my offer. I got everything ready and they came to get it. Now there are two things you need to know.

1. I knew a demonstration of how to assemble it and how it works would be necessary (no, not including a real breast).

2. Jerry Hill is a member of our Bishopric (that's church leadership for all you non-Mormons), and might actually be the nicest guy I know. I think he actually might shake every hand in the congregation, every week. Don't worry, he gets all the late people after Sacrament meeting. In fact, he is so nice I didn't really know how to take him at first. My suspicious East Coast side kicked in, no one could be that nice I was sure. He even seemed to like all the children and youth. But eventually I came to realize, he is 100% genuine and a wonderful person.

So, back to my story. Now when they came to get the pump, both Cindy and Jerry came. So I then proceeded to launch into a VERY detailed description of how a pump works. I got to explain about how your milk lets down and how to vary the speeds on the pump for the different stages of milk production. Of course, I got animated and used my hands to talk as always. Yes, I was even gesturing towards my breasts as I talked about how to maximize milkflow with the pump. Light and fast at first, then slow and strong. Picture that in your mind.

I have to say, having given "the sex/inappropriate touching/talk" at several youth standards events, including a stake one, this might have been the most awkward moment I have ever experienced in my church career. I don't know if I will ever be able to look Jerry in the eye again.